Healthy B.P.M.

I often go visit Isabella Mori’s Change Therapy blog because it’s a great place to learn about ourselves. She says:

Research can be quite futile if we don’t also engage in self-research – soul searching, reflection. a person can be an amazing expert – but if they don’t know themselves, it’s very difficult to make changes. you don’t have to necessarily know absolutely everything about yourself, you don’t need to become a narcissistic navel gazer – but if you don’t know your basic layout, you don’t even know what needs to be changed.

It’s true. Sometimes our basic needs are waiting to be fulfilled.Like food, money, love. Sometimes it’s self-actualization that we are interested in. Coming to terms with yourself has a lot to do with understanding where you are on the need graph.

You’ll really find her article on dismantling an eating disorder from a therapist’s point of view to be quite interesting. Eating disorders spring up from insecure holes in our hearts and the inability to fill some void. It can be changed when we come to terms with who we are and what we need.

eating disorders, anorexia, binge eating, bulimia, therapy

The Size Police come in all shapes and sizes. You meet them in your extended families, in schools, in potential employers….and expectations of the perfect body are flaunted in gossipy magazines and Hollywood drama. Everyone secretly wants to be be perfect looking. Yeah I know they say “I’m happy with my body….” but there are moments when you wish or at least give up on wishing that you were perfect.

How do you deal with the Size Police?

Now if you are a certain size- be it fat or skinny- think about whether you are healthy or not. If not, then you have to work on yourself. Even if you are healthy, there is nothing wrong with leading a sensible enough healthy lifestyle. The point is your size is your problem. And if someone talks to you about the way you look like it’s a random topic(like the weather), I’d say pay no heed.

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Are you shy? Are you proud of it or fed up?

When you are shy:

-Making friends is an effort and it doesn’t come naturally unless you feel really close with someone.

-You want to be invisible in a crowd.

-Doing presentations is a pain. You never get to make the most of an opportunity and prefer to disappear into the background.

-Going to large family functions becomes an obstacle to your happiness.

-You feel isolated and yet you prefer that.

-You prefer to eat alone.

Coping with shyness is an important part of growing up. What can help shy people:

1.Meditation: Looking inward is the best remedy. By realizing your own potential, looking outward becomes easier.

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Working moms have it hard. I liked the way Kelly came to the defence of working moms in her post I’m fat because mommy works. But being a bit of a juggler myself, I think that working moms have a guilt syndrome that they can never quite escape from.

Moms have it in their head that:

-They have to nurture and love their kids. That’s only natural.

-They want to do it by themselves and don’t really trust the help that they get.

-They want to make the money and if they give up their jobs they mope about it or feel worthless.

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This is a great article This Is Your Life (and How You Tell It). It’s the story of how your personality develops from the way you reflect on what happens to you. Different people have different life stories and the way they narrate it determines how far their personalities have changed for better or worse.

What’s your life story? This is a neat six word memoir which I had to share with you:

“Eight thousand orgasms. Only one baby.” – Neal Pollack

You could submit your six word memoir here.

Thinking of your life as a story or a fable really helps you deconstruct your life’s pitfalls and peaks. It’s therapeutic…try it out.

life story, therapy, writing, six word memoir, personality development, narration

Part of leading a healthy lifestyle has to do with being in control of your life. When you are not, you tend to see things falling apart.

One way to be in contol of your life is to quit your addictions. Easier said than done. Meera has written a great post about how she quit smoking for good. She tackled her problem using logic. When you smoke you spend an hour or two on your cigarrettes. That realization changed her approach.

Sometimes having kids is an opportunity to change. If you assume responsibility as a parent then quitting habits like drinking could help. Living with parents on a high could cause stress in children and lead them to pursue binge-drining habits or experience mental trauma later on. Read this.

control, self-control, bine drinking, smoking, addiction, stress, trauma, childhood problems

Yesterday I talked about what burnout is really all about. Sometimes it could be the multitasking you do, sometimes it could be the kind of relationships you are in, other times the kind of compensation you get for the time and energy you invest in your work. All these things can contribute to the level of stress in your life and the happiness quotient you experience.

I would advice any stressed out person to read this excellent article Set Limits at Work to Beat Burnout.

Four ways to beat burnout:

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Job burnout is a common problem that people have to deal with nowadays. Says Shannon in her blog Random Mutterings:

“Work-related stress over long periods places a relentless strain on the body and mind, leading to emotional and physical fatigue. The end result, if not corrected, is burnout. Burnout produces feelings of hopelessness, powerlessness, cynicism, resentment, anger and failure, and results in stagnation, deterioration of quality of work, decreased creativity and reduced productivity.”

Burnout happens when you do more work than necessary and you have impossible deadlines to catch up with. If you feel that your job limits you and lessens your own personal space, you get that listless feeling that is burnout. Some jobs can add to the stress, especially if it’s mandatory to put in long hours. Check this link out.

How do you deal with burnout? More on that tomorrow.

burnout, stress, lifestyle, health, work

The best way to stay young when you are growing old is to get into the exercise routine. Another helper is the Mental Workout. How do you do it?

1. You could start using software like Mindfit.

2. Change your lifestyle. If you have the money and the health to go with it, travel around the world!

3. Pursue new interests. It could be playing sudoku or word games. It could be a new hobby like craft.

4.Watch Television. Television has had a positive effect on the lives of many old people whose kids are far away and whose lives are pretty much reduced to the boredom of retirement.

5. Socialize. The best outlet that any older person can have is while he/she makes friends.

older people, aging, hobbies, Mindfit

“My husband and I sleep in separate rooms. His snoring drives me crazy.”

Men snore louder than women and statistically there are more male snorers out there. Why?

-Men put on weight around the neck area and this squeezes the airway passages causing those irritating snoring sounds.

-Women have wider airways that make their chances of snoring less.

-Heredity plays a role.

Do men snore more than women? is a short snippet on the truth behind the male snore.

Snorers have more chances of suffering from hypertension, cardiovascular disease. Surgery is a good way of elongating the snorer’s life span, sex life and relationship span. Check out New hope for snorers.

sleep problems, sleep apnea, snoring, cardiovascular problems, hypertension, diabetes

Staying on your toes could keep you healthy. But keeping a watch on your feet could warn you of your symptons:

1. Swollen feet could indicate cardiovascular disorder.

2. Numb feet could indicate diabetes.

3. If you keep tripping and you are not all that young, maybe you’ve had a mild stroke.

More feet facts here.

feet, symptoms, diabetes, cardiovascular disorder, cancer

Being positive is an important part of dealing with stress.

Five ways to deal with stress:

1. Be creative. When I’m stressed out, I play a song, scribble an angry picture, or watch T.V.

2. Talk,talk,talk to someone who likes you and will put up with anything you say.

3. Go for a walk.

4.Breathe,breathe,breathe.

5.Read this.

Five ways not to deal with stress:

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I stumbled on to this excellent Book review on a book called RETHINKING THIN :
The New Science of Weight Loss — and the Myths and Realities of Dieting. You have to read it as the writer Gina Kolata looks at a lot of fat issues like

-The Thinness obsession:Kolata thinks that sometimes being fat is out of your control and that society is blowing body image perceptions out of proportion…I’d say shrinking it to size zero.

-The Weight Loss Industry that is making millions out of obese people’s heartaches.

-She tracks different dieters and fads and looks at fattening factors.

You can get an excerpt here.

Gina Kolata, fat, obesity, thinness obsession, weight loss, childhood obesity

What goes on in the mind of a fat child? Check out this post on Angry Fat Girlz.

As parents we can teach our kids some things:

-Go easy on criticism-criticizing others(think about the names kids call their fatter or skinnier counterparts) and taking it. It isn’t easy not to take yourself seriously but once you learn to laugh at your defects life becomes easier. A lot of young kids who are anorexic or have weight problems have a problem with criticism.

Some parenting tips:

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How do you know if twins are on the way for you? This link might help you.

Having twins/triplets,etc is always a secret desire…it’s fun to see two or three replicas of each other walking in the park or running around in the living room. But the reality is that the day your ultrasound confirms that you are going to have more than one child, your heart beat will go up and you will be terrified at the prospect of more than two eyes looking up to you for guidance.

Twin tips:

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