Healthy B.P.M.

We all know stress and anxiety are bad for us. If left unchecked, these emotional problems can have serious physical effects. We spend millions of dollars every year on yoga classes and videos, relaxation tapes, massages, spa visits, and herbal remedies, all in a bid to reduce our stress levels and live healthier lives. Despite all of this many of us are still a bit testy. Whatever happened to friendship? Granted your friends may be just as stressed and testy as you; nonetheless we can be there for each other.

We’re all aware of the fight or flight response. When we are confronted with a stressful situation, our bodies produce chemicals that tend to make us stand up and fight the situation, or run away. This is how science has always viewed the situation, till now. The problem with this theory is that it was based on research experiments using solely male subjects. Scientists believed that men and women responded the same way to stress; however, recent studies have shown that isn’t true. When women are confronted with stress, we produce oxytocin, the hormone associated with bonding. This response probably developed so a woman would protect her family instead of risking her life or abandoning them in a dangerous situation. Nowadays it means that when women are stressed, we seek out friendship. Isn’t that lovely!

The fact that we seek out friendships when we face stressful situations still doesn’t explain why these friendships help women relieve stress. Here’s what the listening ear or the comforting shoulder of a friend can do:

• Be there when you need them. We feel more stressed if we view a situation as hopeless and having no escape route. A friend that you know has your back makes the uneasy situation much easier to deal with.
• Support. A true friend will help you look on the bright side as well as strategize and come up with solutions about how to deal with the situation.
• Laughter. A good hard laugh has been shown to lighten our mood, release stress, and burn a few more calories.
• An ear to listen. Sometimes we just need to vent. We don’t need feedback; we just need someone with an open mind to listen while we rant.

That’s what friends are for and keep in mind that to get a friend you have to be one.